The Power Of Love - Discovering The Love That Lies Within Us All

To feel love for someone and their love in return is the most wonderful experience of our lives. When we feel love, we experience joy and fulfillment, but when it is absent we rapidly become unhappy and disillusioned. The search for love defines our lives and plays a critical role in the quality of our relationships. Love really does make our world go round!

Unfortunately we are rarely given any teaching about love, and yet with a little understanding and awareness it can transform our lives. Love can solve problems and heal emotional pain, but only when we allow ourselves to experience its power - we must invite love into our lives.

Consider for a moment the times when you have fallen in love or felt the love of a parent, child or friend. It is almost impossible to describe those comforting feelings of connection and well-being. Notice how anxieties and problems fall away to be replaced by solutions, ease and confidence. There is a timeless quality about love that buoys you up and protects you in even the most despairing of times. You are experiencing the power of love to heal and bring joy and success into your life.

Love is the fundamental truth of life. We are born to love and be loved. It is our natural state. Some people prefer to see this love as a characteristic of our humanity while others prefer to see it as the manifestation of a divine or spiritual source of love. Whatever our personal belief, the power of love is experienced when we connect open-heartedly with others and embrace our natural connections.

Our emotional and relationship problems result from our denial of love - our separation from the love that bonds all people and separation from our higher or spiritual source of love. This denial usually starts when we are very young and has a damaging impact on our lives. Perversely, we invent all manner of negative thoughts, feelings and behaviors to distract us from the love that we already possess. In romantic relationships we then search for love from another person, or try to gain fulfillment from material possessions, to replace the love that we believe is lacking within. This is a terrible mistake because until we have rediscovered self-love, we cannot give or receive love fully from somebody else.

Luckily the best place to work on finding self-love is within a supportive relationship. All relationships have their challenges and it is by working with our partner through the difficult times that a partnership is strengthened. Relationships fail because of our inability to get to the core emotional issues that create the separation. These will be our fears and insecurities and lack of self-belief. In our attempt to hide away any sense of low self-worth we make ourselves unavailable to our partner. It is like building a fortress around ourselves – we think it protects us but in reality it damages or even destroys our relationships.

The way to embrace our loving essence and our natural connections with others is to be willing to feel all our emotions and communicate about them maturely to our partners. We can also ask them about there feelings and commit to working with them to heal any fear.. Normally we will find that they have just the same fears and insecurities as us, but may play them out in different styles. Getting to these core issues is the key to healing the pain and fear in a relationship and to becoming more bonded.

As we achieve such healing within our relationships we will automatically discover more success in our lives, we will feel more fulfilled and this will make us happier. We can all do this if we can find the courage to feel our emotions and reveal them within our relationships. As our hearts open we will feel all the love that has been hidden behind our defenses and our relationships will go from strength to strength.

Read more articles by: Peter J Granger

How Love Grows (Practical Steps To Keeping Love Alive)

We are meant to live a life of love. However, no matter how successful some are in other aspects of their lives, they don’t feel it’s possible to have the same success in love. They tell themselves to “be realistic.” But being in love is the most mature and realistic thing you can do. The real question is, how can we learn to help love grow in all aspects of our lives? Here are some steppingstones will show how to help love grow.

The One Right Besides You

Most of the time we are either searching for the right person or wanting to change the one we are with. We do not take a precious moment to stop and truly see the one who is right in front of our eyes.

Look at a person who is close to you right now – anyone it happens to be. Notice what you are demanding of them in order to be happy together. Then notice the ways in which you push them away.

For a moment, stop it. Spend time just being together. Allow things to go whatever way they do. Let all of it be fine just as it is. Tomorrow, do the same thing with someone else. The more we can be “right” and happy with each person we meet, the fuller and more joyous our lives will be.

Playing At The Game of Love

So many complain that they are not loved. The reason for this can be quite simple. They are so busy playing roles and games that the partner never gets to know who they really are. They never know either.

Notice what roles (or games) you play in relationships, and what roles you demand others play.. See if you are in love with the person you are with, or with the role he/she is playing right now.

Turn this around for a little while. Stop playing roles completely. Love is not a game we play. Love is knowing and accepting yourself and the other exactly as they are. Who we are is always loveable and beautiful. It’s the roles that get in the way.

Letting Him Come and Letting Him Go

One great obstacle in living a life of love is the tendency to hold on. We grasp and cling to those we care for, preventing their freedom and ease. But this is not love, it is attachment and dependency. In the long run it suffocates the one you cling to and suffocates you too.

Try giving it up for awhile. Let the person come and go as they feel. See how wonderful both of you will feel when you grant your partner this kind of trust. It is said that we can never lose that which belongs to us.

It’s important to put this into action. When someone comes into your life (or day) practice letting him come. Welcome the person – whoever he is. Enjoy what it is he brings.When it is time for a person to go away, practice letting him go. Do not turn the person’s leaving into an experience of rejection, loss or abandonment. Realize that his leaving has nothing to do with you. It is simply time for him to go.

Do this with yourself as well. Let yourself come and go freely in life, not tying yourself in unnecessary chains. The more we free others and ourselves, the more love can grow.

Letting Go Of Unnecessary Expectations

Many feel that love is not possible unless all their demands are met. They can be quite amazed to discover that even when these demands are met, nothing really changes. These demands don’t lead to happiness. They just may be obstacles to love.

Take a look at what you feel is absolutely necessary in relationships. Realize this Expectations may be keeping all kinds of people and possibilities away. Not only that, these expectations can be making you fearful and rigid, not open to what is available.

Let one of these demands subside. At first let it go for just one day and see how it feels. (Remember you can always take it back again). Now try another the next day. As we do this many times, we may find that that which we thought was crucial was only getting in the way. The more we do this the lighter we will feel and all kinds of new people will start appearing in our lives. We have made room.

Read more articles by: Brenda Shoshanna