Brief guide for Saint Valentine’s Day

By: Michele de Capitani

As every year, after the big Christmas holiday season, the big race to find the perfect gift for Saint Valentine’s Day starts. Who is still looking for a soul mate, is aware that this is the last month to find a partner or at least somebody to spend the most romantic night of the year with.

To this purpose there are a lot of dating websites that allow knowing many singles from all over the world and finding somebody with the same taste. But also with very different tastes if you think that opposites attract.
Who doesn’t want to do the first step instead, can just feverish wait for somebody or for some valentines that could come from potential lovers.

But waiting is never a good idea. Especially if you already have a partner who is expecting a wonderful night and a wonderful gift of the heart. To find the adapt gift for this event is never easy, it is even harder than finding a Christmas present, because for saint valentine’s day your beloved is not expecting that very expensive and needed gift, this time what he or she wants is maybe a cheap gift, but that symbolizes all your love for him or for her. A real difficult task, finding a single object able to say to your lover how much you love him seems like an impossible goal, but nothing is impossible, you just need some fantasy and absolutely not to panic.

First of all you have to organize a nice dinner, in a romantic restaurant or at home, the important thing is that the atmosphere has to be really intimate and romantic. If your partner will notice that you planned a bit more in advance and not at the last minute, this will make her/him understand that you really care about your relationship, especially if we are talking about women. When she will be in a good mood, you are already halfway, at this point she will not care if you bought or not that diamond ring she wanted so badly.

As first thing, try to understand if the partner has some very special wish, if she/he thinks to have made perfectly clear to you what she/he wants but you have no idea about it, this could be not a good start for your romantic evening. If you are sure to have carte blanche, the possibilities are very numerous. Just to get a sense of this, let’s start check online shopping websites. You can start to take a look in the different categories, from clothes to accessories, as bags, rings, necklaces, shoes. For a woman these are always very suitable gift ideas. For men it is always a bit more complicated, to avoid the usual tie or aftershave you can check the technology sector, from MP3 players to various iPod accessories, from DVDs to GPS navigators, there are definitely one or more items your boyfriend would love. On these websites it is also possible to buy a subscription to his favorite magazine. Other ideas could be sportswear or sports equipment, or a nice sports watch, a new briefcase or travel bag.
According to his taste and to your budget you can find any kind of gift idea and if you buy online the present will also be delivered directly to your home.

Another great gift idea is for example to book a relaxing holiday week-end in some tourist destinations or in some cities of art, where you two together could spend two or three days of total relax, nothing better to improve the harmony of your couple.

Free Relationship Tips - Learn to Get the Touch Back

By: Debbie Mans

You really need to take free relationship tips when you can get them. OK, I know things have got pretty blah in your relationship and you are wondering what to do. You remember how things were and you crave to have those feelings back again. You want to move in reverse years and see what it was that made the two of you feel so close.

Well one thing that you are probably forgetting about is touching. Free relationship tips remind people how important touching really is. This in no way is a sexual connotation either. It's a feeling of security and knowing the other person will always be there just to make you feel like you.

Free relationship tips say you need to play with your mate's hair, give them a back rub, and hold their hand and many of the other small things that will make them feel good about themselves. Complacency is a tough thing to battle when a couple people have been together for quite a while. There are way too many things around to distract a person. Work, kids, job and bills are great at sucking all the power out of a person. However that's where you need to be stronger and change the results that so many are experiencing these days.

It's time we took over and follow some of the free relationship tips that are offered to you. Fight back and stop yourself from becoming a statistic. Instead help on the other way to building a positive statistic that moves in the direction we would all like to see.

Valentine's Day Gifts Ideas

By: getallabout
Another Valentine's Day is coming up, and it's time to plan the perfect day for you and your sweetheart. This isn't for all time easy, so that's why this piece of writing is here to help you with the gift portion of the evening.

A teddy bear is the just right gift for Valentine's Day, and it does a big job showing how special you feel your significant other is. Whether you desire to get them a teddy bear on its own, or pair the stuffed bear with something, similar to flowers, nothing says "I love you superior." Here are some tips to help you put together the perfect Valentine's day, along with 5 reasons why teddy bears are the precise gifts.

1 - Very Romantic

There is nothing that personifies romance fairly similar to a teddy bear and a bunch of flowers. This is the archetypal "I love you" gift for a reason, and will therefore convey your strong feelings completely. It as well has the added advantage of being a stretchy gift. You can buy a stuffed animal and the flowers together in one package, or you can buy them unconnectedly and customize everything. If you customize you can get any flowers you want, in any size you desire, and you can get a teddy bear that fits your wants. For instance, get their favorite flowers with a teddy bear in their favorite color!

2 - Lots of Fun

A special time like Valentine's Day should forever be as fun as possible, which is one more reason a teddy bear, is such a great gift. You can make a great statement with the bear, and in fact make your significant other laugh. Here's an example, though keep in mind, if you use your imagination you can do all kinds of things! Get a few red ribbons that are holiday suitable and tie them around a nice teddy bear in such a way that they look like ropes. Then get a card and write down "I'm a prisoner of your love!" This will be certain to get a laugh, also as being an adorable sentiment. You can do a variance on this too if you have a bigger financial plan by getting a piece of jewelry similar to a gold or silver chain and wrapping it around the bear. After that your sweetheart will have two huge presents in one huge package.

This thought can as well be personalized if your significant other has a favorite animal, because there's no rule that says you completely have to get a teddy bear. Maybe they'd like better a plush cat, stuffed tiger, or some other stuffed animal. The more you personalize the present to their pastime, likes, or individuality, the more well received the gift will be.

3 - Customizable for Every Budget

Fortunately for our pocketbooks, teddy bears are an item that can simply fit any financial plan. Depending on brand and dimension, they can vary from 10 dollars to 500 dollars. And as mentioned with the chain thought above, you can pair them with lots of other items for a truly special, but still affordable gift. You can keep things small and cute, or you can actually go all out and get them a 90 inch teddy for an extravagant gift.

4 - They Make a Great Keepsake

Candy and chocolates are great, but teddy bears have the added benefit of sticking around later than Valentine's, so we will have a constant memento of a extraordinary day. This way, your sweetheart will forever keep in mind how much you care for them.

Here's one more fun thought. Give your significant other a teddy bear that is holding a bottle starter. They may be confused at first, but then you should pull out a nice bottle of champagne or wine from at the back you. Make a toast to the two of you and your sweetheart will surely keep in mind such a cute stunt with the bear around to remind them.

5 - A Classic Gift for a Reason

Almost no other gift represents Valentine's Day and the thought of love like a teddy bear! There's a basis this classic gift has never gone out of style, and never will. Teddy bears are sweet, cuddly, and sentimental, making them the ideal gift to remember such a sweet day.

6 - Bonus Reason

Still people who are without a sweetheart can take pleasure in getting or giving a teddy bear on Valentine's Day. Give them to your friends and family for a considerate gift to show that you are thoughts about them. After all, a teddy bear doesn't for all time have to symbolize just romantic love. It can represent love of all kinds, and still be suitable and much valued!

Keep in mind, no matter what kind of love; a teddy bear will make a big gift for Valentine's Day! It's an again and again classic gift that can be romantic, fun, reasonable and a enormous way to mark a individual memory. A teddy bear will be certain to make your Valentine's Day extra extraordinary!

How to Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back - Maintain the Right Distance

By: Valfrid Leonie

Whoever said that absence makes the heart grow fonder must have liked being alone. It’s a good idea to keep your distance after a breakup... Most often distance is given to both of you for time and space to rethink things. There’s a such thing of having too much distance and keeping the right distance when your trying to get your ex back. You can give your ex too much space, not enough space or just the right amount of space, its knowing the difference between them that will help if you want to get your ex girlfriend back.

Allowing too much distance between you and your ex girlfriend and hinder your chances of getting her back. If you don’t call and refuse to accept her calls you’re basically telling her you don’t want to communicate. You have to keep a little contact with your ex girlfriend if you plan on getting her back.

You don’t want to smoother your ex girlfriend either. Constantly calling or trying to see your ex after a break up is a desperate way to her get back and will back fire so back up some but not too much.

There is away to get your ex girlfriend back and maintain the right distance. By maintaining a line of communication and accepting her phone calls but only calling her back when she asks you too are a ways of maintaining the right distance and getting her to come to you.

Why People Are Turning to Relationship Advice Online

By: Sharanjeet

When your relationship is on the rocks, you may wonder if you can save it. You may wonder if there is anything you can do to bring back the love of your life to you. Sometimes, it takes more than just talking with each other to sort things out. Sometimes, it takes someone outside the relationship to bring you back together. If going out and seeking help doesn't seem like the answer, this is when you need to find relationship advice online.

The Internet has so much information on it that it is of no surprise that you can find relationship advice online. For more details www.greatindustrialguide.com There are many websites available that can lend you a hand and help in repairing your relationship or figuring out what certain things mean in a relationship.

5 Top Reasons People Use Relationship Advice Online

There are five primary reasons why people are turning the Internet to seek relationship advice online. Many of them are for social reasons, other reasons for convenience. Either way, no doubt the number of people seeking advice online is climbing. So what are the reasons people are turning to the Internet for advice?

First, there's a stigma that comes with seeking outside advice for relationship issues. For many people, it's letting people know that you are having problems. When you see a therapist, you have to go inside their office to get counseled. For more details www.headache-happyness.com People may be afraid that they'll run into a person they know as they go in or out of the building their therapist is located in. With getting relationship advice online, there isn't the social stigma associated with seeking professional help.

Second, relationship advice online is a way to keep problems in the relationship private. If both you and your significant other are private people, using an online relationship therapist keeps the problems within your household and the person or people behind the computer screen.

Third, there's no need to get ready for your appointment. You can stay in your pajamas with your hair curled up and get the advice you need to work out your relationship problems.

Fourth, seeking relationship advice online can save you time. Not only do you not have to get ready for the appointment, you can also not worry with getting ready to leave the house. It saves you time and gas because you don't have to deal with traffic.

Fifth, you don't have to pay enormous fees to see a therapist. Instead, you may pay a low monthly fee or get free advice online. When you go out to a therapist, you are likely to pay more than $50 per visit. In this failing economy, who has that kind of money to spend, even if it's for a good cause?

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How can you get relationship advice online? You can get it by joining a live feed or chat room. When you do it this way, you are likely to pay a small fee but you get the advice you need from people who care. You can also obtain relationship advice online by signing up for weekly or daily e-mails from a website. You can also get multiple e-mails from different websites, which means you aren't limited to one therapist if you choose not to be.

On the Trail of Love

By: josgraf

alternate title: The Spiritual Ecology of the Sun)


Love

is pay-forward and pay-back, at once. . . .

It’s hard to turn away from spirit, and not become egotistic.
Although, the corollary is also true - that is, without love imbuing one’s spiritual wisdom, another form of egotistic destitution can play out.

What is functionality in an incarnation?
In other words, what is love? How does it work? - this heart of life essence, this living business? What would functionalism look like?
Shall I turn to my center, and strive to discover what love is?

Prayer: Love, what would you have of me? Here I am, love, what would you have me do? Teach me, lead me, guide me. Help me to know you, as you are.

One answer: Of those I encounter - strive to know them, as they are. Even beyond their own self-awareness.

Love is ever accessible.

Until we evolve further, we can only love to the edge of our development. Yet, love is, by nature, full. Fully evolved in itself.

We can strive to progress in wisdom, or strength. But love is not the same as these other two aspects of spirit, because love is, by nature, always fully evolved.
Still, I can embody it only to the extent my own progress, or evolution, will bear.

Love is, by nature, of perfect wholeness, fully developed. But a human receives the Impulse into the self gradually.

A white horse. Love rides a white horse.

Ask for love to enter all various activities. Dancing, painting, writing, relating, sleeping, working, meditating, Qi-gong, ?

Study the sun, if you would know love.

Someone said: Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.”
Sometimes.

Love transcends sympathy and antipathy, using empathy as its optimal vehicle.

ove knows what matters.

Let your center guide you, but listen closely because it whispers - like the wings of an owl in flight.

First Cause. Creative Forces.


The older we grow, the more we begin to love the wisdom revealed by life. In the wisdom revealed by life, man forms the seed of his next life as the spiritual core of his being ripens. But the deeds of love are not deeds which look for compensation in the next life. By everything we do out of love, we pay off debts. The only actions from which we have nothing in the future are those we perform out of true, genuine love. It is because men are subconsciously aware of this that there is so little love in the world. A soul must be very advanced before deeds can be performed from which nothing is to be gained for itself; but then the world profits all the more. Love is the moral” sun of the world. Interest in the earth's evolution is the necessary antecedent of love. A Spiritual Science without love would be a danger for humanity. Without sense-born love, nothing material comes into the world; without spiritual love, nothing spiritual. Creative forces unfold through love. We owe our existence to deeds of love wrought in the past. To pay off debts through deeds of love is therefore wisdom.”
- Rudolf Steiner

The Spiritual Basis of Romance

By: josgraf

To explore relationship

models that are counter-productive, one need go no further than what is presented by the media, film, and literature of modern society, as it descends now through the last phase of its materialist mode.
In answer to this dysfunctional arena, and to feed into an alternative stream, this article delves into some of the more whole-some relational and metaphysical dynamics of partnering, by apprehending what takes place beneath appearances.


Entering into relationship

A karmic bond is often the initial drawing force between partners. In a karmic relationship the underlying magnetism can be powerful, as a deeper wisdom works with the alchemic process of karmic balance. Despite suffering entailed (often a semi-sweet tableau), a rich harvest awaits.
Once the mainstay of learning has been processed, by one, or both, of the partners, the drawing force can abate.
Many long to transcend the karmic level, and move into the grace of a soul-mate” communion. Either way, karma or grace - the shadow, or pain body,” is activated to ensure spiritual growth.
Bringing consciousness into the arena of shadow is a central raison d’etre for relationship. No matter who you hook up with, whether the relationship is about karma, grace, destiny, or one’s soul-mate - call it just plain lucking out - shadow will be along for the dance.

Especially for pre-midlife adults, unborn children also create a powerful attracting force between partners. These souls striving to be born select their would-be parents and influence them to get together. The force these spiritual babies” exert accounts for much of the principle energy moving within a couple’s attraction and sexual intensity. The force of attraction can decrease to the extent the spiritual-plane activity of the children abates. For example, by age 7, children have incarnated their own etheric body, by 14, their own astral body. Each phase reduces parental cohesion orchestrated on the spiritual plane, as the child moves deeper into incarnation.

By midlife, a more soulful aspect of a (functional) individual’s biography often plays a bigger part in the bonding force.

A key aspect for transcending the child factor,” as well as enhancing the union in general, entails co-forming a foundation before engaging on a sexual level. The typical model of relationship that Hollywood has been serving up to ticket-paying masses tends to deliver lovers to the same unviable arena of relating that its own celebrities find themselves so often engaged in.
About 95% of love stories that modern film portray entail new partners advancing to sexuality at lightning speed - if not on the first day, then at least in the first week. On film you can do anything. In reality, this factor invites an early dissolution - or, at very least makes for a precarious basis for unity and rapport.
Imagine re-writing these barren scripts, so that a couple spends considerable time in the initial courtship phase, exploring all manner of experience - sharing interests, getting to know each other’s diverse facets, cultivating a soul-deep affinity. In effect, developing a solid foundation upon which to sustain the relationship.
Imagine, also, the dimension nurtured in a prolonged courtship, and the compelling body of experience that gets passed by when a couple depreciates their relationship. Driven by whims of unconscious craving, the intense fire of sexuality takes on a force of its own, so that these potential aspects of intimacy get short-circuited.
A foundational phase also lends room for resolving obstacles, including left over issues from past relationships, in preparation for the new communion. Partners can become active during the courtship phase at clearing themselves, as well as helping each other’s process (most of which is about being supportive, since every individual ultimately has to accomplish such clearing by virtue of their own intention - it can’t be done for someone).

Love at first sight” can be a very real phenomena - but, then, it is only first sight this life. . . which brings to mind that statement people so often throw around carelessly, You only live once.” I always add on - . . .yes, but it’s forever. . . .”

Engaging, once in relationship

As a noted spiritual counselor has stated, The purpose of relationship is not to make one happy, but more conscious.”
Relationship in action tends to address the existential question, where am I? Finding orientation within the soul’s terrain is a natural by-product of relating.
We know it’s working when a relationship induces the partners to fulfill their destinies, to optimize their potential.

Sweet Quotes to Say to Someone: The Language of Love

By: Michael Lee

Having sweet quotes to say to someone is very important to boost and strengthen relationships for the long term.

Words are very strong demonstrations or representations of your feelings towards another. Sweet quotes can actually move someone or even change their mood; it can send excitement and delight to other person.

Expression of the Language

Many people opt to say what they really feel through spoken words, because they are able to clearly express it. And actions just reinforce those words. Sweet quotes to say to someone actually works very well together with acts of kindness.

Initially, you cannot show someone that you like them without first saying it candidly to them. Although actions may be perceived to show that you like someone, they can have different meanings for various people.

To some they might think that what you are doing is something uncommon, and may not even understand that you are doing something out of love for them. They may misinterpret your actions. With verbal words, you are able to specifically convey or let somebody see your intention to that person.

Words can be in the form of quotes. They are created through your experiences and deep devotion to someone. There are many touching quotes that can light up your relationship. Having sweet quotes to say to someone introduces a more artistic tone that touches people more deeply than regular lines and conversations.

Giving Compliments

Try to think of a place, an event or an object that best describes the person whom you're talking to. Make a positive comparison and tell the other person how and why you relate it with them. Having sweet quotes to say to someone is one of the best ways to give compliments and make others feel better about themselves.

Because of the increasing development of our technology, we are able to send our quotes directly to another person through SMS or Short Message Service. Text messaging is becoming widespread nowadays, and it has helped connect people wherever they are, even from remote places. It has become a fine and quicker means to show your affection.

If you think you are good in words then you might want to make one for yourself, this way you are able to integrate what you truly feel. However, if your are one of those not so blessed with the skill in writing, worry not because there are millions of lovely and touching quotes you can get online. Here is an example:

Shakespeare was an idiot and Einstein was a fool, one wrote of love while the other spoke of equations, but neither of them ever found you and that makes me a genius!” -Anonymous

More on Devotion

It is always nice and flattering to receive words of devotion like these. It makes you smile, feel confident about yourself, and creates a tighter bond in any relationship.

Sweet quotes are always a thrill to hear especially if it is coming from someone you love. Thus, take time to think of sweet quotes to say to someone close to you, especially someone you love. Help strengthen your relationship through these powerful sweet words of devotion.

May it be love quotes or friendly quotes; sweet quotes are all aimed to convey feelings towards another person who is the subject of your interest. Having sweet quotes to say to someone allows you the opportunity of sharing the joy and love inside you. Some of the most popular include "You're as beautiful as the sunrise" or "You make the rainy days go away."

Beautiful Vineyard Wedding Dresses

The Vineyard Collection, designed by Mark Brower, is quite simply the most enchanting line of wedding gowns that has hit the runway in years. Designed for the modern bride, Brower combines meticulous attention to detail with a flair for the whimsical and dramatic to create a line of wedding gowns that dazzles with intricate beadwork and flowing lines.

Brower is a graduate of Parson School of Design, and has worked with both Vera Wang and Finesse Embroideries. His pedigree shows in the Vineyard Collection, which features playful touches like jeweled belts and pockets, a la Vera Wang’s whimsical sense of design for the modern bride. The pieces in the Vineyard Collection include bridal gowns, party dresses and formal wear and bridesmaid gowns. They range in style from sophisticated punk, (yes, the two work beautifully together in the Drew wedding dress) to the elegant simplicity of the Tasha wedding gown, a sleek silk charmeuse gown with a very sophisticated flounced V back that becomes a soft train.

The Drew wedding dress and the Tasha wedding gown are only two highlights from the Vineyard collection, which features several dozen pieces in all. Other highlights from the collection include:

Vineyard Collection Bridal Gowns

Kelsey from the Vineyard Collection - This deceptively simple silk and chiffon wedding gown is reminiscent of Greek goddesses. It features a softly draped bodice and back framing a V-neck front and a deep V-back that shows off your sexy back. The A-line style is flattering to most figures and the flowing layers of chiffon and silk accent every move with their graceful flow. The lovely, simple style is set off by a beaded belt at the waist, a surprisingly deft accent that one seldom sees in traditional wedding gowns.

Drew from the Vineyard Collection - As mentioned above, the Drew marries punk and sophistication in a wedding gown that’s the ideal choice for a sassy bride who still gives a nod to tradition. The silk taffeta dress features a vertically seamed strapless bodice with corset styling, and a bouffant tea-length skirt with a net petticoat peeking from beneath the taffeta skirt. This look is very chic, very punk princess and totally modern.

Blythe from the Vineyard Collection - For the dramatic bride with a modern flair, the Blythe wedding gown features a drop waist satin bodice and a tiered net skirt accented with wide satin banded hems. The hourglass seaming of the drop-waist bodice ensures a smooth, sleek fit that hugs every curve without clinging.

Jules from the Vineyard Collection - A daringly different look for the modern bride, the Jules wedding gown features casual shirtwaist styling in a full length flare-to-fit ball gown, a trend that fits Brower’s liking for reinterpreting modern classics with a twist, very Vera Wang. The wrap front styling and oversized off-center bow at the waist combine with the standup collar to create a distinctive and sophisticated profile.

Lindsey from the Vineyard Collection - At first glance, the Lindsey wedding gown is a delightfully traditional wedding gown featuring cap sleeves and V-neckline, but a second look shows off the modern details that define Mark Brower’s Vineyard Collection. The ruched bodice gathers at the center to accent the curve of your waist, and the deep pleats of the skirt conceal side seam pockets, a feature seldom found on wedding gowns.

Gwen from the Vineyard Collection - Delightfully sophisticated and sleek, the Gwen wedding gown plays with the asymmetrical look. The fitted satin gown flows smoothly from a slightly slanted bodice that’s held up by a single

slim shoulder strap. The crystal beading at the bodice adds sparkle and interest, calling attention to the unique styling. The slim lines flow into a soft train, giving the gown an entirely different profile from the back.

Bridesmaid Dresses from the Vineyard Collection - One of the loveliest features of the Vineyard Bridal Party dresses is that they really truly are dresses that your bridal attendants will wear again. Many of the bridesmaid dresses are designed to complement bridal designs from the collection, but they all stand alone beautifully as party and event dresses.

What do you choose for your bridesmaids if you’ve opted for the sophisticated punk princess look? Vineyard Style 1509 is the ideal choice. The knee-length skirt is taffeta over a net skirt that plays peek-a-boo while you walk, and the vertical ruching of the bodice is the ideal complement to the Drew’s vertical seaming. It’s a surprisingly sophisticated baby-doll dress that’s available in eight different colors.

The Vineyard Collection has been widely featured in bridal magazines. Look for more designs from the Vineyard Collection in Modern Bride, Bride and New Jersey Bride, or you can find the collection online.

By: StephanieLarkin11

The Power Of Love - Discovering The Love That Lies Within Us All

To feel love for someone and their love in return is the most wonderful experience of our lives. When we feel love, we experience joy and fulfillment, but when it is absent we rapidly become unhappy and disillusioned. The search for love defines our lives and plays a critical role in the quality of our relationships. Love really does make our world go round!

Unfortunately we are rarely given any teaching about love, and yet with a little understanding and awareness it can transform our lives. Love can solve problems and heal emotional pain, but only when we allow ourselves to experience its power - we must invite love into our lives.

Consider for a moment the times when you have fallen in love or felt the love of a parent, child or friend. It is almost impossible to describe those comforting feelings of connection and well-being. Notice how anxieties and problems fall away to be replaced by solutions, ease and confidence. There is a timeless quality about love that buoys you up and protects you in even the most despairing of times. You are experiencing the power of love to heal and bring joy and success into your life.

Love is the fundamental truth of life. We are born to love and be loved. It is our natural state. Some people prefer to see this love as a characteristic of our humanity while others prefer to see it as the manifestation of a divine or spiritual source of love. Whatever our personal belief, the power of love is experienced when we connect open-heartedly with others and embrace our natural connections.

Our emotional and relationship problems result from our denial of love - our separation from the love that bonds all people and separation from our higher or spiritual source of love. This denial usually starts when we are very young and has a damaging impact on our lives. Perversely, we invent all manner of negative thoughts, feelings and behaviors to distract us from the love that we already possess. In romantic relationships we then search for love from another person, or try to gain fulfillment from material possessions, to replace the love that we believe is lacking within. This is a terrible mistake because until we have rediscovered self-love, we cannot give or receive love fully from somebody else.

Luckily the best place to work on finding self-love is within a supportive relationship. All relationships have their challenges and it is by working with our partner through the difficult times that a partnership is strengthened. Relationships fail because of our inability to get to the core emotional issues that create the separation. These will be our fears and insecurities and lack of self-belief. In our attempt to hide away any sense of low self-worth we make ourselves unavailable to our partner. It is like building a fortress around ourselves – we think it protects us but in reality it damages or even destroys our relationships.

The way to embrace our loving essence and our natural connections with others is to be willing to feel all our emotions and communicate about them maturely to our partners. We can also ask them about there feelings and commit to working with them to heal any fear.. Normally we will find that they have just the same fears and insecurities as us, but may play them out in different styles. Getting to these core issues is the key to healing the pain and fear in a relationship and to becoming more bonded.

As we achieve such healing within our relationships we will automatically discover more success in our lives, we will feel more fulfilled and this will make us happier. We can all do this if we can find the courage to feel our emotions and reveal them within our relationships. As our hearts open we will feel all the love that has been hidden behind our defenses and our relationships will go from strength to strength.

Read more articles by: Peter J Granger

Long Distance Love - Keeping the Love Together Over the Phone

Though most of the people have a very general and pre-conceived notion about a couple i.e. they stay together or meet often, go out for dates and basically are there for each other at all times. But, one stark contrast to this concept of love is long distance love. Long distance relationships are considered to be relationships that never work out or materialize. However, this needs not be true in all of the cases. There are innumerable couples who are engaged in long distance relationships and still have the element of romance going strong between them.

It is a fact that no individual would like to get into a relationship where they cannot be with the person they love. Then how does long distance love come into existence? This is a question, which may baffle a person who loves to get into relationships just for the heck of it and to enjoy the thrill and pleasure of being in a relationship, no matter whether it lasts for long or not.

But, there may be certain set of people who believe in the concept of a sustainable and meaningful relationship, which can stand the test of time. These are the people who generally come under the category of committed relationships. In an unfavorable situations, where either of the partners have to move out of the city, state or even country, these people automatically fall under the tag of so-called “long distance relationships”.

The couples who are engaged in long distance love are merely left at the mercy of technology i.e. web, phone and emails in order to stay in touch with each other or to make a tough choice, deciding to continue the relationship though. They may not be able to spend time with each other or even see each other for a long period of time.

One of the most important pre-requisites for a successful long distance love is the element of understanding, sacrifice and adjustment between the two partners. Though, they may not be able to meet each other regularly but can continue to stay in touch with each other and stay connected over the phone.

It is important for both the partners to stay constantly connected to each other over the phone by talking to each other everyday. Though they need not indulge in lengthy conversations, which may give you a run for your money over the phone bill, but a short call in order to remain in constant touch with each other is not such a bad idea.

For most of the couples, online services, such as instant messaging and emails also play an important role. Though there are several modes available for better communication between the two partners, talking over the phone remains the unbeatable and best option for communicating as it can allow listening to each other’s voice and feeling connected unlike other web service where they can communicate through text messages send over the net.

Read more articles by: Michael Francis

A Spiritual Choice: Unconditional Love Or Conditional Love

In the dualistic universe of relativity there are two ways to look at love. First is the love based paradigm of love that comes from unity consciousness. Second is the fear-based paradigm of love that comes from a separation mentality. Love-based love is unconditional love. Fear-based love is conditional love.

The sad thing about it is because we are taught from birth to experience this fear-based paradigm of love, we not only embrace it, but we create it unconsciously in our own experiences of love. As we set our conditions and experience our fears, we know deep within ourselves that this fear-based concept of love cannot truly be the love that we wish to experience as pure.

It does not seem right to keep thinking 'I will love you if….' If you are a blonde. If you are rich. If you are pretty. If you let me take advantage of you. If you will love me back. It does not matter what the “ifs” are because, with this paradigm, the fear is always there.

You fear the blonde may turn to gray. You fear the riches may go away. You fear the pretty may get old and ugly. You fear that your advantage may change and they will take advantage of you, or you fear that they will not love you.

What you do not always realize is that whoever you are projecting this fear-based love on is doing the same to you. They were taught fear-based love just like you were, and their perceptions of you are also deeply rooted in the concept of conditions. Neither party can reveal their true selves or they will be at a disadvantage in the relationship.

Their fear is that their conditions will not be met and they will be vulnerable to the conditions thrust upon them. Trust is lost and then fear runs amuck with lies, deceit and rejection, all in the name of love, but not love purely given.

What is this concept of love purely given? It is defined within the paradigm of the God of unity consciousness. The God of oneness is at her core pure love. There is nothing to fear about this God because the outcome of your life is assured. This is a God who does not judge you, and allows you to live your life freely in the manner you choose. This is a God who has no cause to punish you. You will not be condemned to hell, because there is no such place in the universe. This God dispenses her love unconditionally and is totally accepting. You can trust and need not fear this God.

We see by our own fear-based system of love (which is the paradigm of separation), and the thoughts we think about love when we are stuck in this paradigm are that they condemn us to never really experience unconditional love.

This paradigm, and the conditioned love it requires, also condemns us to never get to know the all-loving God of oneness and unity. We cannot know this God as long as we choose fear-based actions. The actions that we have been taught all our lives.

These fear-based actions will never allow us to realize ourselves, and never allow us to manifest in our reality the full glory of who we really are and who we can be.

To make this paradigm shift from an untrustworthy, fearful, and vengeful God who is separate from us, to a trusting, loving, and accepting God who is one with us, we have to change the source of our teachings.

In the past we have trusted in the teachers and tutors who have fed back to us the events and experiences of man and have claimed to tell us the truth. Their teachings are well intentioned and not meant to misinform, but the reality is that their teachings came from the same fear-based paradigm this world has subscribed to for thousands of years. This external way of viewing the world has not stopped the killing, hate, and fear that permeates all of civilized society, as we know it today.

These teachings have relied on man's idea that by passing on the experiences of the past, we can make a better future. Man cannot grasp the idea that we should be able to learn from the past, because we continue to repeat the same mistakes and actually kill, hate and fear on a much grander scale. Hate and fear have escalated civilized society's ability to build more and better weapons of killing and destruction.

The concept behind how we live our lives today is rooted in the idea that we are here to learn the lessons of life. We go to school to learn some of life's lessons quicker and easier in a standardized setting. This environment is well suited for the fear-based reality that says we are separate from each other.

By allowing a standardized situation to exist to teach us the lessons of life, we create the perfect setting to truly exemplify and promulgate the separation mentality. This teaching system sets the standards, and the students have to measure up to them. Those that succeed in figuring out the system are deemed acceptable to society, and those who do not are deemed failures and are relegated to failure status in our society.

Success in this teaching system ensures that you will at least have the opportunity to equip yourself with the skills to win the game of survival of the fittest. It does not guarantee the outcome of your life, but you have less fear of losing or failure.

Those who do not succeed in this system are denied many of the opportunities required to play the game effectively, much less win the game of survival of the fittest. It does not guarantee that you will be a failure, but it means that you will have to go outside the system to acquire what you need in order to compete.

Compete you must in this system because it is one of winners and losers. We are taught from early on that we want to be winners. To be a loser is to fail. The outcome of your life is in serious doubt if you are a failure. This is what we have been taught from our earliest lessons in life.

Under the guise of looking out for our best interests, we have been told that we must learn life's lessons in order to be successful. Success was defined in different ways and we could easily look at the world around us and determine that, somehow, success was having lots of money or fame or a combination of both. Somewhere in the teaching process we were led to believe that once you were successful you would have happiness and peace.

Nowhere do they teach you that in order to have happiness and peace all you need to do is choose happiness and peace and then “Be happiness and peace.”

Read more articles by: Richard Blackstone

Secrets For Finding Love Through A Love Dating Site

The Internet is a forum for the provision of many things you can identify yourself with when you go in search of love. The most obvious destination for this should be a love dating site. Follow these guidelines to become rich with the tips of seducing a date:

Why would you choose a love dating site?

The question of privacy

This is a question that most people using a love dating site would be anxious to answer. There are a lot of benefits attached to this question. Using a love dating site presents you with an arena where you will freely and willingly express your love through privacy. Why do you need privacy? You need it because the preliminary stages of any love relationship and even the finale stages need some privacy.

Buy love without charge

A love dating site provides you with the opportunity to pay for love without charge. Most sites will make available free registration to its customers. They will not necessarily provide you with a partner at the beginning, but with the option for you to come to a decision if he or she is just the right match for you. You are given the opportunity to glance through some profiles, giving you an inspiration of what characteristics and attributes that the various potential dates possess.

Therefore, you may have to look only at potential dates that offer or need love if you really want love. Also keep in mind that you will meet so many potential dates seeking for just the same thing that you yearn for in a love dating site.

Making a meaningful contact with a potential date

A free love dating site may not offer everything to you. For you to have the benefit of everything, you may have to improve your free attachment category to a paid or subscribed membership. Do not be afraid because this is usually done for something as little as nothing. With that done and after a careful selection, you will be opportune to make a contact. This is where you will allow your emotions to play the game. This should be the most exciting and delicate part of your dating experience. When you get into a love dating site, select your target very well. Do not go in for looks although they will also count. Take note that all you need is love. Love does not come in the person’s appearances. If you are in search of love, put away any past experience that may act as a barrier. Put out of your mind any past negative response or denunciation from a would-have-been mate.

Be creative

The ultimate goal of a love dating site is all about you making and initiation into the love getting process. So forget about anything that may seem to be a question and answer session. Generate an informal correlation with your potential date and let him or her see that you are intelligent enough to appreciate him or her. Let your potential date see you as a tender spouse, not an interested partner. You are seeking for nothing more than love.

Read more articles by: Alan Lim

Love Astrology: Impact Of Planets On Your Love Life

It is commonly believed that a particular planet makes or unmakes your love-life. This is far from truth though. It is the combined influence of all the planets on the couple that builds or breaks the relationship.

Apart from the ten planets, the Sun and the Moon are included in the ratings of heavenly bodies that influence the life of an individual. Astronomers continue to investigate the gross aspects of the planet, whereas the astrologers, who believe that there is also an inner world in each individual celestial body, investigate the facts and matters relevant to their domain.

It is not that one planet does everything for you. There is special relationship between the planets at the time of your birth. How they interact, influence and interfere in the domain of each other is the crux of the problem for the astrologer. He has to extract the truth, from this complicated cobweb.

Herein, love astrology does not refer to the story of Adam and Eve. It means what each planet loves. Alternatively, it could also mean what is the impact of each planet on the subject called love.

SUN: The most powerful heavenly body. The sun holds the key to our spiritual life. He is life giving and warm body. Its love life indications are good, positive and conducive to mutual understanding.

MOON: The emotional being, therefore moon is associated with the subject love, deeply. It symbolizes feminine traits.

MERCURY: Concerned with intellectual developments and speed. A revolutionary mind as well. A genius.

VENUS: This is the real planet of love. An, enduring symbol of romance. Talents in music, dance and the likes are associated with it. Indicator of love capacity.

MARS: Fights for the cause dear to it, till death. Inclination towards aggression and agitation. Uncontrolled energy and enthusiasm.

JUPITER: Represents magnanimity and generosity. Good fortune, happiness and abundant health.

SATURN: Reputation for causing difficulties and death. The great leveler, who goes by the strict laws of action and reaction. When it comes to punishing, it goes by the rule of book and spares none.

URANUS: Indicates the sudden and life changing things that happen without any known cause. Promises to break the new grounds. An unpredictable planet.

NEPTUNE: Concerned with watery emotions. With mystical experiences. If you want to know why material world of earth is less than the oceanic wealth, ask Neptune!

PLUTO: Power of Pluto directs the great monopolies and big business enterprises. Pluto has been associated as the god of the underworld.

The interaction of all the individual qualities of the planets with the total qualities, make the love life of an individual. So, love astrology is finding out, how it happens!

Read more articles by: Ashish Jain

A Love Spell Could Put Some Magic In Your Love Life

Have you ever had a secret love and wished that person would notice you and be attracted to you? Have you longed to develop a loving relationship with someone special, but found that your best efforts don't seem to be good enough? Have you desired a stronger and deeper relationship with your lover or special friend, but come to accept that they just don't want it as badly as you do.

Wouldn't it be nice if there was something you could do to open your lover's eyes so they were as eager as you to enter into the deeper love relationship you desire?

Many people have found exactly this kind of magic in Wiccan love spells.

Love spells are used to enhance and nourish almost any relationship or love need whether you wish to be reunited with your love, encourage your lover to make a deeper commitment, have a more passionate sex life, or even find your true love.

**What are Wiccan Love Spells?

Love spells have become a very popular form of magic (magick). Wiccan white magick spells rely on the positive energy located in all people and all things. Wiccan love spells are effective because they are designed to intensify and amplify the positive energy that is already present in a situation. They do not attempt to manufacture energy that is not already there.

There is a very broad range of love spells, each of which focuses on a slightly different objective. For instance there are love spells for reuniting with a previous love, and others for finding your true love. There are love spells to increase the passion in your love live, and others to encourage your lover to become more committed to your relationship. There are even sex and fertility spells to help in those areas.

In other words, different love spells can be used to amplify or positively influence any aspect of your love relationship.

**Is Casting a Spell an Attempt to Manipulate Others?

Love spells, as well as other Wiccan white magick spells, work with the positive energy that is in all things and all people. That means the practice of spell casting respects the free will of the people towards which the spells are directed.

While it is true that there are black magick forms of Wicca, white magick Wiccan love spells can be just as effective when cast correctly and in the right spirit. A responsible Wiccan spell caster will use spells that are worded to not be manipulative or violate free will.

For example, a reunited lovers’ spell can be worded to enhance, and bring to the surface feelings that already exist for you until your lover thinks of you so much they can’t wait to have you back.

In this way the spell is not creating new feelings, nor is it making your lover bind to you outside of his or her free will. This is not only respectful of the free will of your lover, but it is also a fullfilment of your deepest desire. You want your lover to desire you from his or her own free will, not because they have been manipulated to do so, or because they have been put in a kind of trance over which they have no control.

**Who Can Cast a Wiccan Love Spell?

An experienced Wiccan spell caster is the best person to cast a love spell for you. For instance, at http://practikalmagik.com Orion has been casting spells for more than 25 years, and knows all the factors that go into casting an effective spell. The most important of these is the wording of the spell itself, but the date and time of the spell casting is also important. As Orion says, "experience has taught me that casting on the best date in the lunar month yields far greater results than if cast immediately regardless of the lunar cycle."

On the other hand, if you prefer to cast the spell yourself, that is possible too. But obviously if you are inexperienced you will need some guidance. Orion's "Love Spell Kit" will give you "the finest, most potent and powerful wicca love spell, herbs, crystals and candles. You will receive easy step-by-step instructions and the exact same tools used in our own personal love spell casting."

Love spells can be an effective tool for enriching your love life. But be sure to remember the adage, "Be careful what you ask for, because you just might get it." Think carefully of the type of love spell you want to cast, the possible results and what you hope to receive from the spell. You will find that love spells, as with any magick, can help turn your desires and wishes into realities in your life.

Visit Orion Tigerhawke's website for more information about Wiccan Love Spells. Orion guarantees you will get results or she will recast your spell until you do.

Read more articles by: Orion

How Love Grows (Practical Steps To Keeping Love Alive)

We are meant to live a life of love. However, no matter how successful some are in other aspects of their lives, they don’t feel it’s possible to have the same success in love. They tell themselves to “be realistic.” But being in love is the most mature and realistic thing you can do. The real question is, how can we learn to help love grow in all aspects of our lives? Here are some steppingstones will show how to help love grow.

The One Right Besides You

Most of the time we are either searching for the right person or wanting to change the one we are with. We do not take a precious moment to stop and truly see the one who is right in front of our eyes.

Look at a person who is close to you right now – anyone it happens to be. Notice what you are demanding of them in order to be happy together. Then notice the ways in which you push them away.

For a moment, stop it. Spend time just being together. Allow things to go whatever way they do. Let all of it be fine just as it is. Tomorrow, do the same thing with someone else. The more we can be “right” and happy with each person we meet, the fuller and more joyous our lives will be.

Playing At The Game of Love

So many complain that they are not loved. The reason for this can be quite simple. They are so busy playing roles and games that the partner never gets to know who they really are. They never know either.

Notice what roles (or games) you play in relationships, and what roles you demand others play.. See if you are in love with the person you are with, or with the role he/she is playing right now.

Turn this around for a little while. Stop playing roles completely. Love is not a game we play. Love is knowing and accepting yourself and the other exactly as they are. Who we are is always loveable and beautiful. It’s the roles that get in the way.

Letting Him Come and Letting Him Go

One great obstacle in living a life of love is the tendency to hold on. We grasp and cling to those we care for, preventing their freedom and ease. But this is not love, it is attachment and dependency. In the long run it suffocates the one you cling to and suffocates you too.

Try giving it up for awhile. Let the person come and go as they feel. See how wonderful both of you will feel when you grant your partner this kind of trust. It is said that we can never lose that which belongs to us.

It’s important to put this into action. When someone comes into your life (or day) practice letting him come. Welcome the person – whoever he is. Enjoy what it is he brings.When it is time for a person to go away, practice letting him go. Do not turn the person’s leaving into an experience of rejection, loss or abandonment. Realize that his leaving has nothing to do with you. It is simply time for him to go.

Do this with yourself as well. Let yourself come and go freely in life, not tying yourself in unnecessary chains. The more we free others and ourselves, the more love can grow.

Letting Go Of Unnecessary Expectations

Many feel that love is not possible unless all their demands are met. They can be quite amazed to discover that even when these demands are met, nothing really changes. These demands don’t lead to happiness. They just may be obstacles to love.

Take a look at what you feel is absolutely necessary in relationships. Realize this Expectations may be keeping all kinds of people and possibilities away. Not only that, these expectations can be making you fearful and rigid, not open to what is available.

Let one of these demands subside. At first let it go for just one day and see how it feels. (Remember you can always take it back again). Now try another the next day. As we do this many times, we may find that that which we thought was crucial was only getting in the way. The more we do this the lighter we will feel and all kinds of new people will start appearing in our lives. We have made room.

Read more articles by: Brenda Shoshanna

A Conversation With Myles Reed Jr. Author Of Fishing For Love On The Net: A Guide To Those Searching For Love

Today, Norm Goldman, Publisher & Editor of Bookpleasures, an online venue for book reviews, author interviews and more, is pleased to have as his guest, Myles Reed, Jr., author of Fishing for Love on the Net.

Good day Myles and thanks for participating in our interview.

Norm: Please tell our readers a little bit about your personal and professional background. And as a follow up, what makes you an “Internet Dating Expert”?

Myles: In my first literary effort, I have conveyed an honest and engaging message about the value of Internet dating. Prior to that, I spent approximately 15 years as a corporate executive, honing my skills of observing behavior and identifying meaningful patterns that create value. I brought all of this to bear in formulating the story in Fishing for Love on the Net.

I am the Internet Dating Expert because I have spent over six years living, breathing and learning the online dating world. I have identified the elements that make Internet dating work. I have synthesized the sum of these experiences into really effective techniques that will equip people to improve their chances to find love online.

Norm: What motivated you to write Fishing for Love on the Net?

Myles: Having personally benefited from dating online, I wanted to share the benefits of that experience. I wanted to write a book that would help people find love by using the Internet. Fishing for Love on the Net is a great resource for people looking for love.

Norm: Why has Internet dating become so popular in the last few years?

Myles: It has always been about love. In spite of the increasing divorce rates, the desire for love is as strong as ever. The Internet is this phenomenal new tool that has substantially expanded the possibilities for people to find romantic love. The increased prospect for love is what is compelling people to participate. It is the reason why Internet Dating has grown.

Norm: With so many Internet dating services, how does one go about choosing one that is reliable and professional?

Myles: What is inherent with the Internet, and particularly with Internet Dating, is the plethora of options. Mainline dating sites, such as Match, Meetic and PerfectMatch are the most ideal places to look for love. They are primarily in the business of creating communities to facilitate romantic relationships. Broader social network sites like MySpace and Facebook are not the most ideal place to search, because there are many other non-romantic activities taking place on these sites.

Norm: What should one be aware of when communicating with a prospective online date? What are the advantageous and disadvantageous of online dating?

Myles: Here are a few important things to keep in mind when you first make contact with someone: 1) The people that you meet online are highly uncommitted during the first few weeks so keep your expectations in check. During the first two weeks, many people will wiggle free and you will toss back an equal number. 2) Your time is important. Don’t meet every person who responds to your profile or emails. Wait until you have had good quality discussions for more than a week before you consider meeting that person.

The advantages with online dating are: 1) Access to a tremendous number of potential mates who were impossible to get reach before because of the geographic limitations. 2) More control is placed in your hands. You can find out a significant amount of information about a person before you determine if it is worth making a connection. This is an unprecedented change in dating. 3) It works. Many single people who are searching for love can change their station in life with the click of a mouse.

The disadvantage of online dating is: 1) Overcoming the mental barrier that romantic love can be created using a box of transistors.

Norm: Should people who are interested in online dating subscribe to more than one site? If so, why would it be beneficial?

Myles: It can be advantageous to subscribe to more than one online dating site simultaneously. You want to drop your line and fish in a pond where the fish are biting. Sometimes the amount of activity that you can generate with one site will taper off over time for a variety of reasons. If this happens, it may be beneficial to subscribe to an additional online dating site in order to get access to a fresh population of prospective mates. This can pump new life into an online dating process that may be going through a slump.

Norm: What is the average cost of subscribing to an online dating service and when would the fee be considered exorbitant?

Myles: The cost of the typical online dating site is approximately $20 - $30 per month. This is a very reasonable investment for an activity that has such a potentially high pay-off. We are not talking about buying a new pair of khaki slacks. We are talking about finding love, which really has no worthy price tag. I believe that the current pricing for online dating sites delivers a very good exchange.

Norm: Whom do you believe will benefit from Fishing for Love on the Net and why?

Myles: Fishing for Love on the Net will benefit every person who is in search of a meaningful relationship. It is for single men and women of every age and every persuasion, whether you have never been married, divorced or widowed. It will equip all of its readers to be better positioned to make online dating a success for them. Everyone can benefit from some advice, and there are many people silently looking for some advice on how to make online dating work.

Norm: What did you enjoy most about writing Fishing for Love on the Net?

Myles: What I enjoyed most was capturing all of my discoveries about this “new world” of online dating. It looks familiar because people are involved, but is a bit different, which is why articulating this for the readers brought me such satisfaction.

Norm: Can you explain some of your research techniques, and how you found sources for your book?

Myles: My single biggest source of research for Fishing for Love on the Net was my more than six years of personal experience living and breathing the world of online dating. I went through many of the pitfalls and failures, but I also experienced great learning and triumphs. I ultimately reach the object of my pursuit, which was a wonderful wife. The principles that I communicate in the book are infused with the details of my personal story to create a substantive and engaging narrative.

Norm: Why do you think this is an important book at this time? What are your hopes for the book? How has the feedback been so far?

Myles: This book is important because millions of people have decided that Internet dating is a viable way to find real and lasting love. However, people are desperately grappling with how to make it work for them. Fishing for Love on the Net is a perfect guide for them. No one would dare put together IKEA furniture without the instructions. This book provides instruction, guidance and hope.

My ultimate hope for this book is that I can help as many people as possible achieve success with online dating, which is finding love in a real relationship.

The feedback has been great. The momentum has been steady. I have had articles picked up for distribution through online venues, as well as fielded interviews from you, Norm, and OnlinePersonalsWatch. Most importantly, the response from my personal interactions with single people has been overwhelmingly positive. They affirm that there is a thirst for an expert point of view about online dating.

Norm: How have you used the Internet to boost your writing career?

Myles: I have engaged a great PR firm, Author Marketing Experts, Inc., that is handling my Internet marketing strategy. We have syndicated various articles that I have written about Internet dating across the Internet information sites. We will also launch a Blog tour in order to create discussion about the book as well as increased web traffic. Given the multi-faceted nature of the Internet, it is possible that some aspects of the strategy will evolve organically. I am encouraged by the marketing power that exists within the Internet.

Norm: What is next for Myles Reed Jr. and is there anything else you wish to add that we have not covered?

Myles: As the Internet Dating Expert, I am very committed to the mission of helping a greater number of people see the tremendous and life-changing value that exists with Internet dating. Fishing for Love on the Net is a beacon for people who really want to find love. I am the process of seeking greater corporate partnerships and distribution to encourage and build-up those who can most benefit from the book and the message around Internet dating.

Thanks once again and good luck with all of your future endeavors.

Read more articles by: Myles Reed, Jr.

Sign Of Affair: I Fell Out Of Love... And Just Love Being In Love

If there is one front-and-forward excuse for infidelity it is: " I fell out of love."

This usually means: I no longer feel sexually attracted to you (I'm sexually attracted to someone else, for now, at least.) Or, I need to spice my life with giddy emotional highs and intrigue every so often.

Infidelity has different faces...and different signs and patterns.

Did you know there are 7 different kinds of affairs? Well, there may be more, but after a couple decades of clinical work and research, I've identified 7.

And, if you look carefully, you will find that each form of infidelity carries different signs and markers. Know those specific signs of infidelity and you can save yourself much grief.

One kind of affair I write about in my E-book is called, "I Fell out of Love...and just love being in love."

Here are some signs and patterns you can expect in this kind of affair:

1. Hang on to your seat. This may be some ride, much like a thrill ride at an amusement park. There will likely be many ups and downs, spiced with dramatic flair. Watching your spouse go through his gyrations may leave you somewhat dizzy. He will give his all to this new-found "love" and at other times might find his way back to you.

2. Typically you will struggle with being ignored and feeling rather awful that you can't provide the "love" this other person seems to provide. You might find yourself questioning your capacity to "love" and your desirability. His affections will obviously be centered on that other person.

3. He may want to tell you about this other person. Not only might he want you to know about the other person he may desire to share with you some of the details of this relationship. He might want you involved. This creates an intense triangle that juices the drama. (Most classical love stories are dramas, complete with a triangle; he "falls in love" with the forbidden or unattainable princess. Often the drama ends as a tragedy - Romeo and Juliet.)

4. Expect some juvenile behavior such as love letters (e-mail), special names, special promises, secrets only for the two of them, etc. Some of these affair relationships are the result of unfinished business from adolescence. Perhaps he was responsible for family or beset by some trauma or internally or externally imposed injunctions that precluded him from dating, socializing with the opposite sex, and "falling in and out of love" a number of times, which is so important and vital for adolescent development.

5. You may hear the persistent phrase, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you." He may truly "like you" and depend on your stability, goodness and understanding. The thought of losing that may keep him connected with you. His fear of losing that which is stable and enduring may conflict with his need to follow his feelings. As well, the possibility of loss may point to the internal emptiness that stirs up very uncomfortable feelings and thoughts. This is part of the roller coaster ride.

6. He may feel very badly about his "inability" to love you and his "inability" not to love the other person. He may express great remorse for the dilemma. He may profess deep sadness for "hurting" you - but, as you know, he has no control. His feelings drive him. His "concern" for you indicates his superficial understanding of relationships. Or, his "concern" for you may be a manipulative attempt to find an easier exit from the marriage.

7. Expect his feelings for the other person to fade. They will fade quickly if this is a pure "I've fallen out of love (and just love being in love)" affair. The "romance" of adolescent love affairs start quickly and end as abruptly. If, however, other issues come into play, such as, resentment and/or the inability to say no, you have a more complicated situation that takes longer to resolve.

Read more articles by: Dr. Robert Huizenga